Experience Peace When Life Throws You the Biggest Curve Ball

(Featured image by Yours Truly, Copyright 2013)

I thought I’d entitle this post in the spirit of the baseball season considering it’s my second post in forever, and the season recenly ended. How apropos, right?!

Seriously, in 2016 the biggest curve ball of my life was thrown at me and I handled it like a World Series winning team (Go Sox!). Actually, it began a couple of years before that, but came to a close in the fall of 2016.

On September 16, 2016, I became officially single. My now ex-husband and I finalized our divorce that day. And you know what – I am perfectly fine. WE are perfectly fine.

As we were going through this incredible change and especially when it was complete, my friends would tell me to share my story because perhaps it would inspire others. I have been thinking about that, but I wasn’t ready nor did I really know how I’d share or what I’d feel comfortable sharing. But, in February as we reached a milestone in our relationship, I realized I knew exactly how! This is my story of how we got to be friends in the end.

February 28th, 2017 brought the month to a close with me recognizing that 25 years ago was our first date (sorta – it was really on the 29th, a leap year, but this is close enough) which got me thinking, we have known each other for HALF of our lives. 25 years. WOW. I wanted to celebrate that and the fact that we are still friends despite no longer being a married couple (not many divorced couples can say that…and it’s unfortunate).

So, how did we get to remain friends? I give it all up to God.

You see, the moment we decided to separate was the very moment that I personally decided to seek Him in a deeper way than I ever have. We made the decision on a Tuesday. That Sunday, I made sure I went to church and I did so every Sunday after that. I spent time in His Word daily with devotions and prayer. I read books that helped me grow my faith and understand what was happening. And I did all of this for months. I already had a strong faith. I just made it stronger…and boy did it help!

When you go through something as life-changing as this you have a choice – you can choose to remain bitter and resentful and hurt and angry and all that comes with it OR you can take everything to God, surrender it all to Him, learn the power of forgiveness and patience and perseverance and….heal. I chose the latter. I believe he did too.

Look…every couple is different. Every situation is different. Absolutely. But, our God is there for EVERYBODY, every one of His children. When you release everything to Him and allow him to take the reigns to help you through it, help you move on, help you grow, prosper and find that peace, it is the best thing you can do for yourself. And that’s what I did. And because I did, I believe my ex and I are in a really GREAT place today.

Today, we successfully and happily co-parented our sweet pooch, Miss Lucy Girl, who we made the gut-wrenching decision to put down in May (When I’m ready to share that story, I will.)

Lucy

Mother’s Day 2017 – 5 Days Before She Passed Away

Today, he remains in the Fantasy Football League that I run…and his girlfriend plays in it too (Last season, her first, she came out the winner. Go figure! And CONGRATS again to her too!).

Today, we are more respectful and kind and loving to each other than we probably really ever have been, but as friends. And this makes us happy! He has a good life. I do too. We couldn’t ask for a better separation. BUT, it took a lot of work to get there. I’m just glad that we didn’t rely solely on ourselves to make this happen.

Anyway, this explains why I haven’t blogged in years too. I haven’t had the desire, as I am sure you can imagine. I hope to be back more regularly but in the meantime, I hope this post inspires other couples going through something similar to figure out a way to either stay together (which we all truly hope & wish for when we tie that proverbial knot) or grow apart amicably. It can be done. We are living proof!

And that’s all I’m comfortable sharing.

If life throws you a curve ball, learn how to play the ball and do so successfully. The best way to do it – go to God. Let him be the bat so you can knock it out of the park for a home run.

OK…maybe that’s a silly analogy, but I think you catch my drift. 😉

 

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